I am nothing but my posibilities. My posibilities define who I am. The world has given me oportunity, and thus has set my path for me.

I cannot be who I want to be until I stop being what I`m supposed to. I cannot be who I want to be until the person that is my possibilities has vanished.

As long as I have a future, I can have no present. I can have no Me.

I've started painting again.

Watercolours this time.


Kinda nice. I like how it's so.. bright and fragile, so hasty and vague. You never know where it might go or how it might end, but then it does, in a matter of seconds. It|s over. You've displayed what you wanted, or something entirely different. Depends. Your view.

One can practice the craft.The craft is only needed as a matter of.. displayal, distribution. A way to channel.  

I'm looking foward to the day that I can say: This is my art. This is my truth.
     This is.. me.

That's what I'm looking for.

Merry xmas, world.....

Small Change got rained on with his own thirty-eight,
And nobody flinched down by the arcade
And the marquees weren't weeping, they went stark-raving mad,
And the cabbies were the only ones that really had it made
And his cold trousers were twisted, and the sirens high and shrill,
And crumpled in his fist was a five-dollar bill
And the naked mannequins with their Cheshire grins,
And the raconteurs and roustabouts said "Buddy, come on in, 'cause
'Cause the dreams ain't broken down here now, they're walking with a limp
Now that Small Change got rained on with his own thirty-eight"
And nobody flinched down by the arcade
And the burglar alarm's been disconnected,
And the newsmen start to rattle
And the cops are telling jokes about some whorehouse in Seattle
And the fire hydrants plead the Fifth Amendment
And the furniture is bargains galore
But the blood is by the jukebox on an old linoleum floor
And what a hot rain on Forty-Second Street,
And now the umbrellas ain't got a chance
And the newsboy's a lunatic with stains on his pants, 'cause
'Cause Small Change got rained on with his own thirty-eight
And no one's gone over to close his eyes
And there's a racing form in his pocket,
Circled "Blue Boots" in the third
And the cashier at the clothing store didn't say a word
As the siren tears the night in half, and someone lost his wallet
Well, a surveillance of assailance, it that's what you want to call it
And the whores hike up their skirts and fish for drug-store prophylactics
With their mouths cut just like razor blades and their eyes are like stilettos
And her radiator's steaming and her teeth are in a wreck, and nah,
She won't let you kiss her, but what the hell do you expect?
And the Gypsies are tragic and if you want to buy perfume,
Well, they'll bark you down like carneys, sell you Christmas cards in June, but
But Small Change got rained on with his own thirty-eight
And his headstone's a gumball machine,
No more chewing gum or baseball cards or overcoats or dreams
Someone's hosing down the sidewalk, and he's only in his teens, 'cause
'Cause Small Change got rained on with his own thirty-eight
And a fistful of dollars can't change that,
And someone copped his watch fob, and someone got his ring
And the newsboy got his porkpie Stetson hat
And the tuberculosis old men at the Nelson wheeze and cough
And someone will head south until this whole thing cools off, 'cause
'Cause Small Change got rained on with his own thirty-eight, yeah,
Small Change got rained on with his own thirty-eight

I know that it is freezing, but I think we have to walk
I keep waving at the taxis, they keep turning their lights off
But Julie knows a party at some actor's West side loft
Supplies are endless in the evening by the morning they'll be gone

When everything is lonely I can be my own best friend
I'll get a coffee and the paper, have my own conversations
with the sidewalk and the pigeons and my window reflection
The mask I polish in the evening by the morning looks like shit

And I know you have a heavy heart, I can feel it when we kiss
So many men stronger than me have thrown their backs out trying to lift it
But me I'm not a gamble, you can count on me to split
The love I sell you in the evening by the morning won't exist

  -Bright Eyes

I don't go to church on sundays
don't get om my knees and pray
don't memorize the books of the bible,
I've got my own special way...

I know that Jesus loves me
  Maybe just a little bit more
I fall to my knees every sunday
  at Zeralda Lee's candy store

100 pageviews x10!

uhm..

that is..

1000 pageviews!

farewell, pitiful three-digit numbers!

well, lets not get carried away here^^
.
.
.
.
.

FUCKIN' YEAH!!


by the way, I at this moment practically havent slept for... about 34,5 hours..
allright!

really fucks up your day at work, I tell yee ^^

Enough with the bird deviations already!

Broken bicycles, old busted chains
With rusted handle bars, out in the rain
Somebody must have an orphanage for
All these things that nobody wants any more
September's reminding July
It's time to be saying goodbye
Summer is gone, but our love will remain
Like old broken bicycles out in the rain


Broken bicycles, don't tell my folks
There's all those playing cards pinned to the spokes
Laid down like skeletons out on the lawn
The wheels won't turn when the other has gone
The seasons can turn on a dime
Somehow I forget every time
For all the things that you've given me will always stay
Broken, but I'll never throw them away


-Tom Waits

Greetings everyone.



To say things like they should be said, I'm personally going through some rough times right now, and as a result to this I have begun to question my very "Materialistic" way of taking pictures, focusing on cleanness and perfect conditions, longing for more expensive equipment that will let me take better quality pictures.

So I have decided to put it to the test.

The pictures I will be posting are mostly experimental, most of them taken in dim lighting, some grainy, experimenting with movement and so on and so forth. Not all of them are of equally high quality, but that is not the point either. I was lucky enough to have my friend model for me in most of these shots, and mind that at least one of the sets was taken in the middle of the woods, in the middle of the night in utter darkness with nothing but a flashlight, a camera, a tripod and two friends.

I hope atleast someone find a few of these images mildly interesting. I do. They represent something for me, some more than others, and I hope.. I don't really know what I hope for. Happy days, perhaps.


"Cause I am a Rain Dog too"

Couple of new photos now. Yay
  The latter one I posted was primarily  for the fun of it. I played around in Lightroom with it, and suddenly realized the sun looked like some gigantic explotion or something. I found it kinda neat, so I posted it too see if it was something people would find interesting or not. We'll see if I leave it standing..

Secondly I've decided to remove most of my obnoxiously large black frames. I mean, they kinda punch all of my pictures to death
I never quite realized it until someone noted me 'bout it.. and I must admit they do look better with a more subtle frame. Perhaps they'd look even better with no frame at all, but that'll have to be for another time.
  small steps


So, in other news... nothing much is happening.
  I'm getting seriously tired of the internet of nothinghappeningness...  The web just gets so incredibly dull after a few hours of boredom, but still.. it's like a drug.. every I open my computer I click the FF button almost on instinct. I guess it becomes an addiction, huh? damn, that's lame...

Wellwell, Let's all go outside and play for a while, hm?
    and remember to bring your cameras

It's 06.34AM right now, and I've already been up for about 2 hours. And I haven't got a job. I haven't even got school. I ain't got no reason to be awake 'cept I can't sleep.

I mean, usually I sleep in late.. Usually I get up 'round 2pm or later and I guess it's nice to wake up a bit earlier, get more out of the day, but before 5? That's just f*cked up.

I even awoke my gf: while I was at it..  


Anoying...



plus I'm hungry!

Hello everyone!

Guess this is my first dA journal entry.
This taken into consideration.. I have no f***ing idea what to write here

Oh, yeah, I know. I was out today and bought myself my first non-kit lense
Nothing much, Canon 50mm f1,8- but it's a whole new world to explore compared to the old fucked up 18-55. It's not the best, the most expensive or the most interesting lense out there, but hey, I'm just getting started, and I don't have the cash to burn on those sweet sweet L's...  ohgodIwantoneXP

wellwell nevermindthat.

Hope I'll be posting images more frequently hereafter. I doubt it tho, cause I'll prolly start workin again soon..  

we'll just have to wait and see, won't we..

I'll shut up now.....